Promise Not to Stop When I Say When
by runicmagitek
Summary: During a break on the road to Zanarkand, Lulu seeks solitude and finds a companion to confide in. Mid-canon Auron/Lulu


for wingsyouburn with the prompt: _get me - a story about one character saving another_

* * *

Pyreflies swarmed the ruins. The distinct hum of the wandering lights was no different from the ambiance brought by the lull of ocean waves. Everywhere, yet not. Homesickness hollowed Lulu's heart, or so she convinced herself. What was home anymore? What was the point in yearning for that which she would never return to?

Yet another truth she tricked herself into believing.

The group remained by the camp, either drifting to sleep or basking in uncomfortable silence. As for Lulu, she excused herself without a word and trekked down into the nearby structures that remained of Zanarkand. The deeper she plunged into the ruins, the more she forgot why she wandered to begin with. Was it to clear her thoughts? Or perhaps to submerge herself in them?

She paused at an opening, eyes set to the vivid, dusk sky. Nothing but death lingered around her—a strange reminder of the events to come.

 _I made a promise_ , she thought, closing her eyes. _I_ _'_ _ve come too far to turn my back now._

The shuffle of earth sounded behind her—footsteps, no doubt. A flicker of fire danced in her palms, only to die out. Her instinct told her Wakka was dumb enough to follow her in and deprive her of solitude, but the gait in the steps didn't match what she had grown used to.

"If the others are worried about me," Lulu called out, her voice beyond jaded, "then it would be in your best interest to turn around and tell them I'm _fine_."

Nothing. All movement stopped.

"Lucky for me," a familiar, dry voice told her, "I came on my own terms."

Her lips quirked, accompanied by a scoff. "I certainly hope it wasn't to pester me with conversation, because you'll be disappointed."

Lulu spun in place to find Auron standing in the sweep distance. He perched his katana upon his shoulder and regarded her with the same, contemplative gaze he always wore. She swore he smirked, albeit short-lived.

"Have I ever been one for talking?" Auron asked.

She raised an eyebrow. "As much as I have."

Nodding his head, he gestured to Lulu with a free hand. "Mind if I join you?"

"Don't tell me you're the type who enjoys sunsets," she spat out more so than teased.

"No. Simply wanted a moment alone in a place like this."

Auron never made a habit out of lying, yet Lulu struggled to pick out the truth behind his words. He was like her, after all—speaking only when necessary while shrouded in a mystery for the sake of their own well-being. Some called it armor, but for Lulu, she plummeted herself in darkness if it meant keeping others at bay. No one deserved to wallow in her closed-off emotions.

And Auron still managed to find her.

He approached Lulu, lodging the tip of his katana into the ground before situating himself against a broken pillar. Her red eyes scanned over him, perhaps longer than she wished to admit. Even for his age, his dedication as a skilled warrior and now guardian paid off in the toned muscles beneath his haori and armor. Far more useful than her frail frame. He relied on strength and agility alone to protect Yuna. As for Lulu, she required aid from Kimahri with sliding down the anchors of the airship back in Bevelle. Granted, that _was_ Tidus' fault for even fathoming such an idiotic means of crashing Yuna's wedding, but the point remained.

Without her magic, she was nothing. Useless. Just as she was to those before Yuna.

And yet she continued to mentally brace herself for the moment Yuna asked for Lulu to be the fayth in her Final Aeon. Not because Lulu deemed herself the strongest, but because she had no other choice. For everything she failed to protect, whether her family or friends, she wished to remedy that failure with her sacrifice. Nothing waited for her back in Besaid. Not a plan for the future surfaced to mind. All that mattered was aiding Yuna to the bitter end.

If not Lulu, then who else? Better to ease the suffering of others and spare them the misery. _It will be better that way_ , she told herself like a mantra.

The only other candidate qualified for the task was Auron. A seasoned guardian and a capable fighter. Perhaps more so than herself. She lost track of the times he stepped in mid-combat to stop a monster from delivering a blow to her. Mages were fragile souls, after all, capable of more than the mind could imagine, though forever dangling from a thread. She could pride herself in the knowledge that she was at least mentally strong, though with the passing days, Lulu questioned that, as well.

Every step taken, every word uttered… all of it scrutinized by Lulu. One wrong action and she would splinter into a million pieces with no one to help piece them back together. She needed to stay strong—for Yuna, for the others, for herself. Failure wasn't an option, despite Lulu being far too familiar with the sensation.

Maybe, even if for a moment, someone else could be strong for her, someone who wouldn't flinch when she broke down the wall she placed between herself and the world.

"Lulu?"

Throughout their shared silence, Lulu looked at Auron, yet focused elsewhere. An awkward situation, no doubt, but judgment did not wrinkle his face. Something warmer resided there instead.

"Thought I lost you for a second," he added on.

A flutter of a chuckle brought a temporary smirk to her lips. "I do that more often than I'd like to admit."

"Something troubling you?"

She wanted to laugh. Instead, dread festered in the depths of her stomach. "What's the point of even talking about it?" Lulu shrugged her shoulders. "We're _all_ in this together. It's no surprise that some of us are struggling with the reality that's at the end of this road. We can't change our fate. This is how life has to be." She shook her head and lowered her eyes. "I'd be an idiot to be scared now… to be having second thoughts."

 _There_ _'_ _s nothing for you,_ Lulu reminded herself. _It has to be you. Everyone else has a home, a family, a dream. You? What do you have? What_ _'_ _s even left for—_

A hand sank into her arm, the sensation penetrating the fur draped around her form. Lulu dared to lift her head enough to find Auron beside her. Despite traveling and fighting as allies, his presence struck her as if it was the first time he closed the distance between them. Softness swelled in his good eye, a sharp contrast to the stern features of his face. She memorized the strong line of his jaw and the muscles of his neck leading down to his shoulder. She would have been lying if she claimed she never gazed upon him in such a fashion before.

"Out of everyone here," he whispered, "you have the closest idea in terms of what is in store for us at the end of this journey. You wake up every day and continue life knowing that. Not everyone has that sheer strength. And yet of all your annoyances, you are the harshest on yourself."

She failed to maintain eye contact. "And? What do you want me to do? Fix it? Auron, this journey is almost over. I'm not going to change just because—"

"You speak as if you will die tomorrow."

"So what if I do? I knew what I was signing up for before Yuna left for her own pilgrimage. I didn't leave Besaid for the sightseeing."

"Then what for?"

Lulu sighed. "I thought you didn't wish to come here to speak with me?"

"I didn't, but I'd be a fool to not comfort you."

"I don't need comforting," she spat out. Lulu shrugged him away and pivoted to walk elsewhere. Anywhere. She wished he never showed up.

She wished he yanked her back into him.

Auron didn't run after her. Not to her knowledge, anyways. Her steps slowed not long after she opted to storm off. Lulu shuffled to a halt, eyes to the sky. Pyreflies wove through the air above, their lights more prominent as twilight fell over Zanarkand. Her heart rattled in her chest, her breath skipped in her throat, and her eyes blinked back what she refused to release.

Those familiar footsteps followed in time. She commended his persistence.

"I'm sorry," he said after some time.

Tears trickled down her cheeks, despite her efforts. "For _what_? You've never done a damn thing wrong in your life."

Did he… chuckle? She couldn't tell.

"I promised to serve as Yuna's guardian, but also to lend my hand as a skilled swordsman. I was raised under the notion to protect those incapable of doing so themselves."

"If you wish to call me weak, at least be blunt about it."

"I'm not." His gradual stride brought Auron closer. "You're far from such a descriptor. You're stronger than most people I've met. And I'll continue to ensure you live to see the next day, but…."

Lulu swore his breath brushed over her neck. She inhaled—that scent of his simultaneously teased and tormented her.

"I wish I could save you from the demons which plague your mind and soul. You have the whole world to live for—"

"I have _nothing_ to live for—"

Arms enveloped behind her. A soft gasp squeaked past her lips. She froze, fearing a single twitch would shatter the illusion she swore was cast over her. But Auron squeezed her, buried his face into the crook of her neck, and murmured upon her skin.

" _I_ want you to live. I will do whatever it takes to ensure that. If only I could slay the darkness inside of you. Anything to bring you a sense of peace, Lulu."

A violent shudder rolled down her body. Thankfully, it didn't deter Auron. She found his hands with her own, releasing a breath when he allowed her to entwine her fingers with his.

"I wish I could forget everything," Lulu admitted through the tears and trembling. "Evey last horror… even if it's brief. I wish I could breathe easy and not have the weight of Spira on my shoulders."

"You're not alone."

She scoffed. "Don't feed me frivolous nonsense like that. I am not a child needing others to care for me. I can handle my problems on my own."

"But you don't have to."

"I…." Tears rolled off her chin and splashed on the ground. "I don't wish to be a burden."

"You never will be in my eyes."

He held her for what felt like an eternity. The purplish light of twilight fell over Zanarkand. Pyreflies swirled around them with an ethereal chime.

Lulu sank back into his body, his heat, and licked her dry lips. "What would you do to save me from myself?"

His answer was quick, yet certain. "Anything."

With a shaky breath, Lulu released her grasp from Auron and turned into him. He repositioned his hands to her bare shoulders as she flicked her eyes over him. The pyreflies illuminated sections of Auron, the rest of him succumbing to the shadows.

Her fingertips dared to brush over his cheek. "Then help me forget?"

There was more hidden behind her tongue, but the words were lost. They locked sights and somewhere within that gaze, Auron understood. It was in the way he brushed away her tears, the way he pulled her in closer.

The way he nuzzled in to catch her lips with his own.

She opened her mouth to his, welcoming him with flicks of her tongue. Needy hands clawed at his shoulders and head. Both of their hips rocked into one another with burning fervor. Lulu plunged into his scent, his taste, his heat and refused to surface for air. If she paused for even a second, the illusion would shatter.

 _This isn_ _'_ _t the time or place to be doing this,_ she thought in between fiery kisses. She gasped when he nibbled at her neck, when he ghosted a curious hand over her curves, when he fondled her through her attire. Blush seared her cheeks. Manicured nails carved down his chest to toy with the hem of his pants.

 _But if not now,_ she reasoned with herself, _then when? If ever?_

Auron's hands found a home within the laces of her corset. With a flick of his wrist, the tight laces sighed loose and unraveled the rest of her garment at an alarming rate. It was, after all, every sense of the word impractical, yet remained one of her favorite outfits. She suffered through it if it meant striking fear into those idiots she crossed paths with.

Or in this case, striking awe with a trusted soul when it pooled to her feet.

Lulu stood clad in a pair of black, lace-topped stockings with panties to match. She resisted the urge to fidget, yet failed. When was the last time she stood nude before someone, let alone be intimate with another person?

Auron scanned over her voluptuous form, a small smile lengthening his lips upon returning eye contact. Not a word left him. He smothered Lulu with kisses. He danced fingertips across her skin. Every action sparked another fire inside of Lulu until she roared brighter than any spell under her repertoire.

That pesky obi of his came undone—more like borderline ripped it off, much to Lulu's frustrations. She pushed his haori off his shoulders and drank him in when he dismantled his armor. Nothing but skin meet skin. He laid her down on top of his haori with utmost care, only to have Lulu pin him down and straddle him.

Between their desperate kisses and clinging, they paused to stare at one another. A million sentiments swirled in their eyes. All the pleas and frustrations and fears. Somewhere lurking within it was a sliver of hope, of happiness. That much they could share. Everything else could wait.

And when Lulu found a steady, yet vigorous rhythm with Auron and filled the night sky with decadent moans, she forgot everything—everything but him.

* * *

Darkness shrouded all of Spira. Lulu yawned and stretched, nuzzling further into Auron's sleepy embrace. They tangled up in one another, slick with both sweat and sex. Her muscles still twitched from exhaustion. How much time had passed?

She nudged Auron until he opened an eye to her. Neither spoke, instead exchanging bittersweet smiles and kisses.

"We should head back," Auron suggested, despite caressing her with both his hands and lips.

"Wouldn't want the group to worry," she added.

A chuckle rolled through him. Reluctantly, they parted and stood. Lulu heaved out a sigh at the thought of slipping back into her garb for the sake of decency, only to flutter her eyes when a thick fabric enveloped her. It smelled like him. Peeking back, Lulu caught sight of Auron clad in his pants while collecting the rest of his attire on top of her intricate gown. She smiled, nestling into his haori; part of her wished to never return it.

With the obi fastened, she joined Auron in their trek back to the camp. More than once she caught his eye wandering over her form. She ignored the heat returning to her face; they needed sleep more so than another reason to pounce one another.

Embers flickered in the dying fire upon their return. Wakka slumped over snoring outside the main camp, no better at keeping watch than Lulu imagined. Everyone else slept soundly, much to their surprise. Lulu breathed easy once they crawled into Auron's tent.

He embraced her, kissed her shoulder, then pulled her down for a proper night's rest. Lulu rolled into him and used his chest as a pillow. His heart pulsed in her ear, yet was enough to lull her to sleep.

"Maybe," Lulu murmured before she drifted off, "when this is all over… when we no longer need to fight… we can revisit this." She cooed at the mental image of walking the beaches of Besaid with Auron. Not a worry in the world. Just them, the ocean, and the sun forever rising and falling. "I would love that."

She thought he smiled. Or maybe she imagined it. If he ever responded to Lulu, it was lost to the night with everything else.


End file.
